The horror of a phallic radish. Screenshot taken from link below. 1
An iconic scene in the comedy Blackadder is when two devout Puritans are served Radish shaped like a male appendage. 2 Sitting down with my fashionable cousins, my Burger King meal garnered much the same reaction.
With puritanical zeal, the kilojoule count of my meal was pain-stakingly psychoanalysed as omens of my future obesity, depression and untimely death. They argued I needed a dietary intervention: juice detox. Listening to their outspoken commentary, I felt like Madison Chapman watching Simon Wilson eat KFC. 3 However, the qualifications of these critics extended to Remuera delicatessens, detox diet blogs and a sheltered education at Dio.
It is no surprise false prophets in the world of food exist. As Anthony Warner asserts, the claims fad-diet ‘gurus’ make are scientifically unsubstantiated. 4 However as I looked across at my cousins, I was struck by the fervour of these false prophet’s disciples. They perceived their value-judgments of my meal not as personal opinion but moral obligation. Whilst they may appear to be over-enthusiastic health junkies, the Marlboro cigarettes and Prozac 5 medication stuffed within their handbags suggests otherwise.
Anthony is right in attributing the allure of false food prophets to the persuasive pseudo-science they espouse. 6However, I think of equal importance is the ability of food prophets to sell us a lifestyle rather than just food. A silver bullet which can completely transform our lives into something devoid of the anxiety, insecurity and hurt we feel now. For disciples like my cousins, it is this belief that drives them to keep spreading the word of the miracles their diet can bring, in the hope that if they say it enough it will eventually become true.
- BBC Studios. A Drunken Roar – Blackadder – BBC. From Youtube. Video, 2:55. Posted by BBC studios, July 13, 2010. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HcnxsDOxcOA.
If you wish to watch the link, the Puritans appear at 1 minute mark. ↩
- Ibid. ↩
- Chapman, Madison and Simon Wilson. “The food critic and the rookie head to KFC.” The Spinoff, December 11, 2017. ↩
- Warner, Anthony. “Heart of the Problem.” The Angry Chef. Updated August 25, 2018. https://angry-chef.com/blog/heart-of-the-problem. ↩
- Prozac is commonly prescribed to people who suffer from Eating Disorders or Depression. Source Medsafe New Zealand. “Prozac: Consumer Medicine Information.” Updated June 2010. https://medsafe.govt.nz/Consumers/CMI/p/prozac.pdf. ↩
- Warner, Anthony. “Heart of the Problem.” The Angry Chef. Updated August 25, 2018. https://angry-chef.com/blog/heart-of-the-problem. ↩
I was trying to figure out a way to fit Monty Python into my blog post but it wasn’t happening, but this inclusion of British comedy is masterful………..
I try not to judge people, but people from Remuera are just different man. It’s like this perfect little cloistered community and when I was young I used to go on google maps to look at their swimming pools and tennis courts. They seem to have everything yet they are the demographic that are positioned to be the ideal consumers. How can they want more if their life is already perfect? I guess because brands and diet fads aren’t just products, they’re sort of humanised and positioned as an answer to problems. It’s weirdly reminiscent of religion and for cloistered communities it’s hard not to be complicit when brands may seem like the only thing that’s genuine. I say make Mad Men mandatory viewing in decile 10 schools…
Calling diet-peddlers ‘false food prophets’ I think is very apt. They’re acting on the same principle as evangelicals, trying to force their beliefs on others because they believe they’re helping them, and in turn bettering themselves because of it. I wouldn’t go so far as to say the behaviour is diabolical, but it certainly seems misguided. Religion I think should come from within, and I think the same of food and lifestyle, though maybe a licensed dietitian is also a good idea.